Lately, the loss of Alana's twin sister, Rhiannon Elizabeth, has been brought up quite a few times. It hurts me that I can't hold her or kiss her or spend time with her. I sometimes look at Ali and can almost see her double there with her. I am still dealing with this after 8 years. I can't help but wonder if the pain will ever go away.
I also have been having a problem with feeling unwanted. My girls don't need me as much anymore, and A. J. is doing the whole "I want daddy" thing. That in itself doesn't really bother me. I'm now having to defend myself against my "egg donor". Yeah, I can't call her mother or mom anymore. She has now decided to take out her anger at me on my son. She's not happy that I called her out for her petty jealousy and saying stupid stuff. Her loss, but it still hurts. How can someone take out their anger on someone that is innocent? What a witch.
